Here I am, sitting with the worst case of Sundayitis I have ever experienced, reliving the days of the past year that have gone in a blink. I have the work wear dragged back out of the attic with 75% of it sent to the charity shop, a Zara order has been made to give the confidence boost that will be needed by the end of the week and I have the girls clothes and matching socks left out to ensure they don't end up dressed like 2 little boys in clothes I didn't even realise they had (where do men find these?).

I considered trying to catch up on changes in the company, but I will have enough time to do that. Up until now 'share performance' to me has meant how well Bella has been sharing her toys. I hopefully will get back into the way of business speak quickly and without speaking in a weird high pitch and adding a 'y' to most nouns.

I have practised my smile and nod for when I hear 'you will be happy to get back for a hot cup of coffee and adult company'. They are right I will enjoy those moments but unfortunately it's sometimes not enough for when I am really missing my babies, esp in the early days where I feel like I have 2 large parts of my body removed.

I still have no idea how I will have us all dressed and out the door by 7am... I can also put money on the fact that this week my 2 both start to sleep passed 6am.🙄

Tomorrow I will hang up my 'full time mum' hat and become 'working mum' - ha yea right! I won't be handing them over to childcare and forgetting about them, not a role you clock out of. Who comes up with these titles? I will always be a full time mum to the day I die. Also 'full time mums' are also 'working mums', the most important role there is, also with the biggest bonus'. I will enjoy getting to be the boss though, something I am most definitely not (however hard I try) at home, the 2 littles really do dictate!

I am more than grateful for my time off on maternity, I got to spend every single day of Annies first year with her, I got to hold her through the hardest of days and be the smiling face back to her when she achieved so many firsts. I got to have an extra year off with Bella, my first born and the one that made me crave to relive this experience so much. I feel so lucky that in our country we have the option of this time off and we are able to take it while still protecting our careers.

I will be doing a 3 day week this week to help smooth the transition. I am already looking forward to Wednesday to spend time with my littles.

So in the meantime I will continue to be positive, paint my face and put on a brave front while secretly my heart is hurting that's it's the end of such an important chapter. Here's to the next one though and many more amazing memories to be made!

Are you heading back to work soon/ or headed back recently... Let me know how you get on.

I will update you soon,

Anna xx

If you want to read a more positive maternity post and a little more on work here's a post from a few months back.